Monday, 19 May 2014

speak when you cant speak

i cannot  forget my 1st - 2nd years of college life. those were the two years wherein i have absolutely done nothing. OR to put up in my words, those were the two years wherein i have done almost everything. those two years, i explored myself as an individual. a lot of things which i only thought of doing or had done had i been with ample time, those things i actually did. a few ups and downs, a few disappointments, a few negative outcomes, yeah, these things did follow; but, still, a few cherishable memorys i have always built up.

when it comes to friends, a few of my most awesome school friends, i have cherished really sweet memories, along with them. whatever, one thing i did "too intense or agressively" i should say in last two years is.. writing. lols. i never realised it at that point of time. but today, when so many people approach me, and discuss with me about my blog; not only friends, even a few strangers following me on facebook or mailing me on gmail, about my blog, i realise i have really invested a lot of time in writing. but, last year, that means, 3rd year of my college life, my blog and my writing habit has really seen a dormancy. i have stopped writing. this made me feel that "writing" is just one other hobby that possessed upon me and then descended.

but, its about a few days ago only, while travelling and waiting near bus stop for 832, i noticed something. it was a picturesque view. it entrailed me, striking strong waves of energy all through within my body. and it started happening. it is all shown in bollywood movies that whenver something unusual happens in the life of the leading character of movie, a song or  a  background music is played; relating to the feelings, emotions and situation of that moment. lols. no. nothing like this happens in my life. but, yeah, a kind of manifestation of a similar phenomenon. somewhere within me, starts a soundless recitation of thoughts and things which i am feeling at that point of time. its almost similar to writing. i definitely dont have a pen and paper to pen all that. so, it just plays somewhere within me. i can write when i cannot write. this phenomenon used to happen with me very frequently all the time. i must say i have a brain which cant sit idle. it leads itself in occupying itsef one or the other way. but, now, when it does happen to me, may be seldom, but it does, i realise may be these thoughts are just so natural. i dont intend to germinate or perpetuate  them. they are small vibrating figments of energy needing space to stabilise.

oh yeah. that picturesque view i had to talk about. near bus stop. the bench i was seated on, leaving one seat, on my left, was a couple of a guy and a girl. ok, i take my words back. may be they werent a couple..as in.. i dont know.. it doesnt matter. both of them were communicating with each other through sign language. yeah. they couldnt speak. the intensity, the flow, the grace, they were communicating was marvellous. i was able to realise the strings of love between both of them. i am saying again, i donot know how they were related to each other. but, then, there is love in all other ways other than romantic love. it all was so graceful. for a moment i felt, the level of communication they share is all above the way we communicate. sometimes, we really say a few things we dont really mean to. and sometimes,  few things are interpreted by others the way it isnt supposed to be. i know it is not really good to stare at others shamelessly the way a dozens of people were doing. its not good. but, yeah, to feel the warmth of their overflowing love, i couldnt resist myself to sneak a peek of them. here annd there, after a few seconds or so, i would rotate my  head in all directions and simply pause in left for a few seconds and then do it in the other direction to not give an idea about me being seeping into them. but, then who cares. a dozen of people were staring them, but, those two were talking. talking and talking. i felt a few things they infact dint communicate through sign language, they just dint, and the other simply understood. that. that. one moment i realised the power of a human. the divinity of god. the divinity of love. the divinity of expression. i write. some say. i write awesome. huh. and over there was seated a perfect example of "marvel" on to my left. all i wanted to see and see and see them and harbour the love, affection, and energy all within these tiny little eyes. their art of expression is above all of the other arts of expression we know.

 girls! i know girls like speaking so much. i know a lot of them. and i am one of them. when i speak and am with those people i actually like speaking to, i speak so much. infact, to know, if i have actually cultured intense love for somebody, i can try this as a footnote. the more i speak, the much i am in love with that person. this is the reason why my talks are always endless with my old school friends. i love all of them. i have read a few of novels written by "cecelia ahern". a few characters  i have noticed she builds, are really, really very girlish. the way her poignant character speaks.. with all expressions and all.. i really feel like i am actually talking to a girl. so, leaving all that, when a girl speaks, you know its a girl speaking and end of it! the end. so. when that girl started up with sign language, her body language, her gestures, her modulations (i know, for modulations to exist, you need sound, and she wasnt speaking), all gave an impression that you  are talking to a girl. and she appeared to be beautiful. for beauty, not a thing which is naturally unusual, can lessen it. beauty is beauty. its energy. its positivity you feel when you are around that epicentre of radiant energy.

and so the guy was all listening her..all mum. what i wanna say is..any lack of some physical sense, or some thing unusual, has no potential to take away the beauty. beauty and all the above love; all is divine. abstract. beautiful abstract. expression. you could express whenever you intend to. you dont need words. you dont need a tongue perhaps.

lols :D
i know i sometimes think too much. lols :D

keep smiling. keep growing. stay happy.
any feedbacks?!
please reply at:
ishaa.jain31@gmail.com

3 comments:

  1. Hey, Like to write a novel ? Their is a deal for you !

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey! Yeah. I would love to. So. Whats the deal?

      Delete